Bernie “Rebirth of the Spirit” answers a doofus question from Rolling Stone, “Do you believe in Gah?”
Yeah, I do. I do. I’m not into organized religion. But I believe that what impacts you impacts me, that we are all united in one way or another. When children go hungry, I get impacted. When kids die because they can’t afford medicine, I get impacted. We are one world and one people. And that belief leads me to the conclusion that we just cannot turn our back on human suffering.
Jesus, how do oldsters get away with such poppycock?
1. Why the second “I do.” One’s not enough? Trying to make yourself believe the unbelievable, soft-shoe Bern? Wife after husband’s paramour calls “Do you Love me?” Husband. “I do. I do I really do. Or maybe. Or maybe.”
2. Then, the total non-sequitur. “I do. I do. Say, didja catch those Mets? How about the way eagles fly? Ever had trouble opening a can of Skippy Extra-Chunk?” Bern tries ferociously to change the subject, fails dismally. No, when there is hunger in the world, ol’ Bernie is not “impacted.” By definition. If we were “impacted” by every injustice in the world, we would not eat another morsel.
3. We are one world, full of incredible disparities, and there ain’t nothin’ Bernie can ever do but bathe himself in existential overreach and imagine himself the bleeding conscience of the entire dying, hungry, sorrowful world, and then go get a burger and live to opine for another day.
4. Thanks, Bern, for confirming, once again, to a dumbstruck, looche world, that there is not, and never has been, and never will be a “Gah.” This pronunciation, by the way, courtesy of a churchified Hispanic inmate.
5. Don’t worry, maybe in ten years, if this social reality makes it that long, Bern can be honest about his Brooklynite “Gah” to the idiot journalist. Until then we get this. We do. We do.